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Good Morning Nanty Glo!
Sunday, May 20 2001

The wife's pool

On the warm days in April, as my wife and I drove around Nanty Glo and surrounding communities, she kept commenting about the swimming pools she saw open and some in the process of being opened. Finally, after the tenth such comment, like a well-trained husband, I got the message. She wants me to open our pool.

Female logic is difficult for us males to understand. For a long time, I wondered why my wife didn't come right out and ask when she wanted the pool opened. After 18 years of marriage and 10 years of opening the swimming pool, the answer came to me. She knows that when I take the winter cover off and find the water looking like the bath water of the Jolly Green Giant, I am going to be a little upset. Then when I find that leaves and twigs made it into the water in spite of the cover, I am going to be a little more upset. Then when I have to keep adding chlorine, PH up and PH down and algaecide and decalcifier and clearout and who knows what else, I am really going to be upset.

At that time, she can look at me and calmly say, "Well, Dear, it was your idea to open the pool." That is when I smile sweetly, turn my back to her, grit my teeth and get back to work on her pool.

Notice that I call it her pool. I don't like swimming in water that goes round and round, makes you smell like chlorine, makes your eyes red and turns your hair green. Give me the stagnant water of a strip mine hole, or the muddy water of a farm pond or a deep spot along a stream. Now, those are the kinds of swimming pools I remember.

As a kid, I didn't worry about what was in the water as long as it was wet and deep enough for swimming. I never had to worry about opening the pool in the spring or covering it in the fall. Mother Nature took care of those chores.

Bathing beauties

Two old-timers were seated on a bench along the boardwalk intensely watching the bikini-clad sun worshippers lying on and parading around the beach. The first one asked, "Do you like bathing beauties?"

The second man thought a long time, then answered, "I don't rightly remember. It's been a long time since I've bathed one."

David Caldwell

More great words of wisdom. . .modern proverbs

You'll notice that a turtle makes progress only when it sticks out its neck.

If the grass is greener on the other side of the fence, you can bet the water bill is higher.

And last but not least—God gave the angels wings, and He gave human beings chocolate.

Sent by Zan
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